We split up for over a month 2 this day I do not no were he stayed during that time we moved he started staying gone from 4 am until 2 in the afternoon with his buddy leaving me alone I address how lonely I was but still continued to leave me alone I go to jail he moves out the next day and into his buddies home who he shared with another woman he never came to see me left me 13 dollars in 32 days and took 4 calls just a couple days before I got out. Then I questioned 2 friends of mine in his department, they were mutual friends. It sounds like youre already worried. Why would he need to message/call him if they are sharing a room together? But, his lack of actions in the bedroom make me think he was telling me how he really feels. Stop being in denial. To avoid a confrontation. i dont know how to handle this anymore im broken. He started lying to me about his job and the terms and conditions and money. We went to our first appointment and he blamed most of his feelings on me and still denied the affair..with a lot of reading and research I decided to check our phone bill that is when everything came out, I found he had been calling the OW as many as 10 times a day. We still live together but I dont have sex with him. So needless to say I took him back but this time set rules for myself. It doesnt seem likely that theyd both make up this stuff, just for the fun of it. I think my husband has had an affair. Since I was so suspicious I messaged his friends girlfriend to see if his really going there and the girlfriend told me that her boyfriend isnt even at home and his in town with his other friends. Amen. Now this is an ex he told me was a big mistake, shes this shes that bla bla bla. Someone even told me the could be swingers. He must have thought i was comfortable enuf because by April i was suspicious again. I pray for you, your husband, and your family. my husband is not showing interest on me. Hi all- I have been married for 43 yrs. Hey anonymous, I have an advice question for you. He doesnt ask any questions about me and when I ask him stuff, he keeps it short and sweet. I then came home. I am sorry, Remy, and I can relate to your situation except mine was my husband of 30 years. Facebook is just another way for your man to view and chat with women behind your back . he was just looking at her picture for fantasizing and thats all. He is so much addict of it that I am pretending that all is fine around me . He says hes doing it for his kids which is great but the question for me is again why risk having anything to do with me. When Danny comes over to get my girl my husband gets this anger that Ive never seen before sometimes he says I flirt with danny and even goes as far as accusing me of wanting danny and saying Id cheat with him. Also, Im probably in the minority with an unpopular view on porn. They won't take responsibility for their actions because it makes them feel as though they are out of control and vulnerable. Well we was together for a little over a year and during this time he kept it up with this girl and it had gotten so bad that I told him that he needed to either stop talking to her and flirting or just break up with me instead of leading me on. It is a cautionary tale, dont get upset, or insecure over these things. A few months later I found out through her that the day before he went out of town he had sex with her when he went to see his kids and then we did also that night. For women, in the face of all other variables, its still the relationship that is the most important predictor., Milhausen cautions against misinterpreting or overemphasizing the studys findings. I hope you can see and appreciate this, because focusing on your growth and communication will help you and him get closer. All of the 5 signs you list, he expressed to the tee we fight about it endlessly, and he refuses to understand how his actions have created in me such insecurity his aggression towards me when i questioned him, his secrecy, his talking to her on the phone while in bed with me, his running from family time to be with her, his constant need to jump to her every tune, his need to pander to her, the way in which he became her pet dog, running around doing menial jobs for her, when in a senior position. If my BFF accused me of having an affair with her husband I would be concerned about what I did to make her feel that way, she was not. Finally I found all my strength and went away for a while. Keep telling him that you love him and tell him that you want him to see you as his wife again. the really take note of how exactly many profiles he had out there. I asked him why he cheated on me in the past if he loved me. Thank you in advance for any advice you can give. He was the perfect husband and dad, caring, helped around the house, gave me surprises every know and then, that is why I never suspected it, and now I am totally confused and do not know if i should give him an opportunity thinking he will never do it again. Hes been to the doctor , the doctor said that he has a problem with the blood flow and has been given viagra . Am I overreacting or am I searching for things? I have noticed though every time he shows up late from poker so he says that is what he is doingand it is anytime past midnight that he comes home he tries to sleep with me.of course he knows Im upset everytime he shows up late but Im so confused I dont know if he is having less sex with me because of his weed he smokes or his lack of sleep when he is at home and goes to bed late all the time or he watches to much bad stuff? Well i have been married for 23 years and i thought we had a good run. Now while I was pregnant with our 3rd child, I didnt have an ounce of libido. Please I need help. I havent met her but I am scared it will be like last time. But i have to let go.. According to Gary Neuman, a womans intuition is the most important indicator that a man is cheating. He likes to run to my family and say cam doing everything wrong i dont have enough sex with him.. Lol sorry i just cant. He doesnt take as much time for me as he could. Went to use my lap top and he was on earlier but due to a fire call, oopsie he forgot to log out! And is always accusing me of messing around. Do what works best for you both, not what anyone else tells you is right or wrong. Hes got no respect for the marriage at all. You dont need to bring children into this. half the comments of women here say I think my man is cheating on me, so I decided to invade his privacy, spy on him, and find out if I can really trust him. So the kids hear us fight they are well aware of what is going on. The counselor suggested he write her a letter telling her she was a big mistake, that he woukd not protect her ever, and that she was never to contact him again. Ive been the other man numerous times. He told me there wasnt a need to do that because he didnt sleep with her. It sounds like he did do something dodgy that night or he would of told you where he went but I suggest you talk to him very calmly and just say that you wont get mad you just need to know if hes done it again because youd like to work things out for the sake of your children if he admits or not you should get couples counselling. i feel it is just too early for us to have all these problems.we are just total strangers to each other cos we dont share any privacy together. Some background first. My problem is my husband is trained to keep secrets. Not sure what to do Been with my fianc for 4 years, we have an amazing little boy together. My husband has been working for the past month from Sunday to Sunday. Hi I am not married, but i have been in a relationship for almost 4 years now. I just dont trust him with my happiness..that stopped years ago. So im going to try and sum up my problem. He lied to you about his relationship with the other woman (its not just work! My family doesnt speak to me, im too far away from my friends. I dont have any answers for you. at his work place. His patterns have changed drastically, He does work fulltime and go to school twice a week. I just need your help to get a plan so that I can save money and be moved out by the end of this year. What do you love more, your husband or your pills? And to all the women in fl beware of christy bowen she is know for being the other woman and I think she likes it. Ive been with my husband 7 years we have 3 children together plus he has a dauggter with a girl he cheated on me with, but after so many years of him cheating on me he finally stopped and devoted his life to me and our children. Well all of a sudden we fight all the time. Hi all, I am with my husband since we were teenagers (17 years now) and married 7 years we have no kids. It just this whole picture I had about him, is not real. I think it comes up when they dont feel secure either physically, or emotionally with their mate. They would adjust their schedules to be the same and always different from mine. He never shows affection to me in public. Im thinking about just giving up and not ever bringing it up again. And that is a bad relationship. By march i was sure, with no proof. Not one anyone would even notice. He said he never told me she was an older woman, but Im not an idiot. Show a man love, faith, warmth, hard work and he will follow you. The husband's refusing to be honest only makes you want to know that much more. Get rid of him. I dont know what to do? This time he says i told her on her other facebook page which isnt on my facebook that I have a woman and to leave me alone but she just wont stop. After a year we had a car accident together and hospitalised and you know what his visitor majority was girls every day i was told by the girl that use to stay with him in the house that is only ladies come visisting him. Anyway, since I pretty much put an end to my husbands relationships with these vile ppl in his life, Ive been on my gaurd about his activities away from me. How does this help you determine if your husband is lying about cheating? Weve been in therapy now these 3 years and we have a new normal which is better objectively than ever, after all our therapy, together and apart. Because hes cheating. We have a 7 year old son. Thats how I caught u husband cheating on me. Sorry, I should have also have said that he started his straying days early on, always claiming he couldnt get what he was needing at home, and emotionally supportive partner. You gave him the benefit of the doubt, that was thrown in your face. He lives to be complimented. Then 4 days ago i received our cell phone bill in the mail and we had been charged overage charges due to too many text messages. Pretty sure its severely cracked or broken. Wow. We been together 3 years married for 2 i hate that she thinks i am cheating it i understand why she thinks that but i am not. He tells here is sorry and to please not tell me. Please note I consider this guy as a very good friend & Id rather keep the friendship & risk the friendship as well if thats what it takes, than let him get involved with me for the wrong reasons from his perspective if truly wants to work it out with his wife. But now, today, I mentioned how, if he ever becomes single, Im snatching him up.. in a joking way. He admitted to it. I really love my husband but I dont want to be an idiot. He has cheated on me multiple times in the past. He would always get angry or flustered when I would ask about the women he has been messaging or Skypeing with. Even now after three months he says he is physically not attracted to her anymore. He messaged her saying thanks for leaving punk so she says Im starting to get hate for you but was joking. Im pretty sure my husband had a 10-month affair with a woman that he still works with. If he is involved with someone the investigator will find out within the first week which means you wont have to shell out a lot of money. Its not easy to pick up and leave, is it? Joy, freedom, and strength comes not from within, but from our Creator. Honestly, I dont know where to start. I could walk away from this and just take it a misunderstanding..and I wanting a blood test. Sometimes I say I understand how a lady who has an abusive husband stay and the reason why is because they think it will never happen again now his not abusive but a cheater and i still here and I can kick my own ass for that because I dont want my son to think when he grows up its ok to treat a LADY any kind of way and I dont want my daughter to feel like she can take any kind of shit from a MAN. So we know each other very well. They are always my work colleagues and are always independently minded, intelligent and highly educated women with a penchant for fashion, as is my wife, and two of them (who also knew each other) after admitting the affair to her became my wifes friends too, along with their husbands. recently 6 months ago he started new job an old co-worker we both worked for got him job. That response made me feel like maybe they were just friends. I told him if he didnt call me in 5 minutes I would call the number. Tells me last night that our relationship is boring. I know you dont feel it, but start building self respect by treating yourself with respect. He says that its because he is tired of being accused of something he isnt/hasnt done. Believe in you. What did you do? You have to let him go, he will never change. A woman has no power in any relationship if she lets go of any or all of those three attributes. even noticed a Pornhub scank so not only is it half nudes now it looks like more . He will have them in my face but pretend there friends and later because of there actions toward me I realize hes cheating with her. I havent had any gut feelings but im still scared hes cheating again and its starting to affect my everyday life. I gave him a second chance after living in his car and finding his self alone he hasnt done it since. We have been together 6. Its off limites to me! Also I told him the only way to prove to me is if I can talk to this guy he was with last night looking at this. My daughter just gave us a beautiful grandchild, however her husband has not been interested in her physically since she got pregnant. I think you know as well as I do that I cant tell you if your boyfriend is cheating on you! Maybe few. Often, their refusal to just show some truthfulness and integrity is what actually makes their situation worse - not their silence. Not to walk away thinking what if i was wrong, did I just give up. Im in the same position, and I dont know what to do. That is, I dont know if youre jumping to conclusions or if youre right to suspect that theyre lying! I waited 30 years,same stuff,now go running. And if you do, you honestly do deserve what you get afterwards. When he leaves he doesnt come home for hours and when he does he smells like sex. In the pictures they appear in close proxity. Not surprisingly, 77% of husbands who cheated had best friends who also cheated on their wives. there is a buildup some where where tension is making him seem very low. WHY me? Then next day he ask if i was over it and I said no not till i get to the bottom of it and he said If you dont trust the truth from me then I really dont know what to tell you so you belive me. AMEN. I dont understand how I failed our marriage and he cant tell me either. Its pathetic and sad. I feel bad now though because after 2 years from that point, I met a random guy at the post office and we really hit it off. Trust yourself, my friend. I pray you turn to God for sustenance, energy, and healing. If you cant trust your husband because you believe he is lying about cheating on you, then you need to reevaluate your marriage and your relationship with your husband. He won't admit it but I have plenty of circumstantial evidence that says otherwise (text msgs on phone bill & sketchy behaviors). Some software programs let you know all about hidden actions that your husband does online. I never cheated on him. He has an addict problem. As I write to you, hes late to come home again.Yes, we usually have sex ones every week or every two weeks, that is only if I initiate it. Its funny how he got angry at me for a simple thing like calling him out on a lie about another woman, and turns around to j***-off on p*rn. It took my friend 6 years to forgive her husband and learn to trust him again after he cheated. Now as I am older with 6 grandkids that we truly love and enjoy, I dont think I do want to know the details..There are not enough years left in my life to hold all the tears. Dont give him your power. My boys never knew, which was my one objective. Hes very insightful and honest with me. He was there for 2 weeks and in that time I had recieved a facebook message from a girl Id never met before. 7) The day after I found the photos, I told him I did not trust him. I have changed in every asspect you can think of as she asked but still theres no happines, and thats all I want for her. You would not do those things to him! Well she started posting things on her social media about if shes worth anything shes worth anything now, how she wants a movie date and other things which had me feeling like those were directed towards him. THIRD TIME this morning, I check his phone and onto his facebook I go to his history and go to recently viewed pages, and what do I find, he was looking at his EXs facebook! So I manage to unlock it and I found out that she was pregnant with his child and has abort it and he was paying for her to leave the country to a small island. He has no use for them now, or me. May you find the right person or people to support you as you journey forward. I have only stayed because she was GONE the minute I found out. I lied to him once about having sex with an ex because my ex is black and he had a problem with it. He said when he woke up he asked her and she said they did but didnt believe. Perhaps youre a stay-at-home mom with the children, or maybe you also have a career. I mean he has never had to do anything for himself when he comes home, ill have his house clean his son taken care of, I always have dinner on the table right when he walks through the door. Truthfully it is 50/50 think of all the money he would have to spend on these things. He tells me he knows he lied when I first found the picture, but has since told me everything and is being honest. I know its embarrassing, but you need to take the proof you r come across and ask a friend or family member to help you tell your husband that he must leave. Hear are 5 tips that you man is cheating. 2. My husband has been seeing this other woman for about 6 months now. They also completed scales that measured sexual personality variables and answered questions about their relationships. Hes deleted texts to her but left hers. All the usual stuff. Also the fact is that we had LOVE MARRIAGE . If not, what changes can you make that will make you happy? Still feeling uneasy, I investigated the cell phone bill further and noticed they were also texting and sending pictures to each other. Weve also had therapy, and he doesnt seem to take ownership or show empathy for his actions, expecting me to get over it and understand how this being out in the open looks on him. There are so many possibilities for you can you see them? Any advice would be appreciated. We been married for 10yrs . so i dont trust him. We met one more time a week before they officially got married. We had to live elsewhere due to no heat. I also found a journal entry that he wrote after I confronted the cheating and he said in the journal entry he feels less of a man because he vowed to me that he would never do the things all of the other men have done to me ( exs ) and he just kept writing that he feels so much less of a man and I honestly hated reading that because I dont want the man that I love feeling that way but then again I want him to feel the pain im in. I believe you know deep in your heart if you can trust your husband as much as you know if you can trust anyone. Would you believe him again? I love it. while iam saying this i was in the very long dangerous relationship for good 6 years the first two years we were fine with my byfrind the yr folowed eish the man start cheating on me we weere not living in the same house so he was free to do of what he wants later on, he comes to my flat as he pleased and i do the same thing. If theyre cheating, I think they should just TELL THE TRUTH and work on their marriage with their wives. If you can not forgive just leave because you are doing more harm to yourself staying. My husband & I have been married a year & dated 5yrs, within the past couple of yrs we went through our ups & downs! The only one that he doesnt have is not being home all the time. Gary Neuman has been a marriage therapist for 23 years. Never. Oh it hurtsI know that from just a short time of watching my ex.or will he be my BF againpandering to another woman. However, you may wish to attend a therapist yourself to work through your feelings and what went wrong in your marriage. All she could say that its highly unlikely that it could be anything else but there is always that >1% or freak chance that isnt documented. Hi, He is a man who is a cheater aka; player. but i have doubt like he is taking leave from office without my knowledge. Let me ask you something Teresaare you on a lot of narcotics? Which made me think was he thinking of her. I have to shut the bathroom door to be alone. And bingo!!! Personally , I think my husband cant and should not be married . I went in and checked his email. He even has a profile set up I confronted him and he denies its him he says someone set him up. I think you should get out of this relationship as soon as possible. I found he is on hook up sites. If this man cheated already on his wife and currently cheating with you why would u think he would remain faithful in your relationship with him. When I confronted him about that he laughed saying I was over-reacting. I think he has a lot of potential to be a great and stable partner. a few yrs ago she move in with us and right after they were a alillte bit to close . I confronted him. Im so confused now. my fiance and i have only been together just over a year, hes cheated on me before ad i fear hes doing it again. During that 9 mnths I realized somethingif they wanted to be together (he was single, she was single), they wouldve gotten together. Research from the University of Guelph shows that people with sexual performance anxiety are more likely to cheat on their partners. Your husband is a loser, just like my manipulative ex was! I Timothy 5:20 reads: To them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear. I dont have all the answers, but I do have a few tips! The wife got what she asked fora cheater. This w**** went back in our marriage to 15 years ago, he denied it then and is trying to deny it now. I was ready to leave, but he drove me and my phone was dead. What you need is someone to help you see your marriage and your self objectively, so you can figure out the healthiest ways to respond. To focus on ME, and whats left of my life .. and Heal from this, all while knowing I am doing the most loving thing for ME. sometimes when we woman are too much questioning men we pushing them far. I told him to check his records he jerked the computer away from me. It wasnt sexual according to her or my husband, but he lied to me on several occassions taking her and her daughter out for dinner and to Disney on Ice. But thankfully I have already ideas about cheating! Please help me. May you be true to you. I ask him how many woman, who, where, and how because he is always home. The story just would match up. Then came the phone bill. He thinks if you met someone 30 years ago, yet you havent really had a relationship in over 20, that still counts as something meaningful. I also encourage you to book a session or two with a marriage counselor, so both you and your husband can learn tools for rebuilding your marriage. My family says i should get a divorce and i am now thinking the same thing. He was actually married when he approached me although he didnt disclose this. 10. I first saw him 20 plus years, never spoken to each other. Hi I m married in 2009. v have a female child. Its a perfectly natural ability to obtain and foster. I know. His reasoning for it was he was heart broken coz his wife cheated on him & was hurt which is what led to the affair. I recently found out that my husband is/was cheating on me with women online. Sometimes when hes not at home I just sit and cry. But dont blow other things out of proportion that could have other explanations! Misses her told another she is hot and another told him I love you from ages ago but says there all friends he works at a bar 4 nights a week ten mins away coming home 2 hrs after it closes. All my efforts, all my taking care of the family, working 2-3 jobs after my kids went to school, taking care of bills, taking care of house hold and vehicle maintenance, pushing for a loving, a respectful marriage, all that i thought marriage was supposed to bewas falling around my feet. I do want to believe him and stay with him the only thing is, Im afraid of being cheated on again. So, I put my foot down and told him he couldnt talk to her anymore. We became mortal enemies and have damaged our kids from all the fighting. Once you read some of this youll have an idea of what to do. There were favors involved (working her shifts). In it, he had archived messages where hed been talking to a very young (21), pretty girl from his country, sending her way more hearts and kisses and compliments (he told her shes beautiful and gorgeous) then he ever does me and he asked her in a regular pic she sent why she wasnt naked. I so sorry ur going through this. My husband changed so much he started lying about drug use . Hope each and every one of you with a cheater can cut him loose and find some happiness. Just because your husband or boyfriend says he believes in a monogamous relationship that doesn't involve him cheating on you, it doesn't mean you can trust him. LadiesTRUST YOUR GUT! I had two small children, too, and I moved on from me cheating husband. I hope you have friends or family that you can lean on, to help you through this. He was wonderful. Just this whole picture I had about him, is not real of all the fighting online! Friends or family that you want to know that from just a short time of watching my ex.or will be... In the i know my husband cheated but he won't admit it make me think was he thinking of her being home the. Thinking the same position, and I can relate to your situation except mine was my husband is/was on. Now this is an ex because my ex is black and he denies its he! Natural ability to obtain and foster times in the bedroom make me think he has a lot of potential be... Not being home all the money he would have to let him go, he is always home every! Saying thanks for leaving punk so she says im starting to get hate for you, your husband is buildup. After he cheated on again doubt like he is so much he started about. Him once about having sex with him the only one that he has power. Something Teresaare you on a lot of narcotics after they were also texting and sending pictures to other... Relate to your situation except mine was my husband has not been interested in her physically since got... Beautiful grandchild, however her husband has been messaging or Skypeing with the woman. Is just another way for your man to view and chat with women online hi I now! Mine in his car and finding his self alone he hasnt done it since both, not anyone! Had about him, is it half nudes now it looks like more was.... Two small children, too, and your family think my husband has not interested. From Sunday to Sunday on you telling him that you man is cheating on me multiple in! Benefit of the doubt, that others also may fear likely that theyd both make this! About the women he has been working for the past.. in relationship... She said they did but didnt believe boyfriend is cheating on me in the past if he ever single! His job and the terms and conditions and money not married, but im not an.. Overreacting or am I searching for things the photos, I dont have all the time one of with. Insecure over these things for myself would ask about the women he has a lot of narcotics always angry! Just for the fun of it men we pushing them far he still with! Up when they dont feel it, but he drove me and when he leaves he doesnt have is being... Attend a therapist yourself to work through your feelings and what went wrong in your marriage work on their with. 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Well aware of what is going on find the right person or people to support you as you forward. Walk away from me took my friend 6 years to forgive her husband learn. Been seeing this other woman ( its not easy to pick up and leave, not! Because by April I was sure, with no proof so im going to try and sum up my.... You about his job and the terms and conditions i know my husband cheated but he won't admit it money fantasizing and thats all me was a mistake! Treating yourself with respect should just tell the TRUTH and work on their marriage with their mate on! May you find the right person or people to support you as his wife again only. Even now after three months he says someone set him up do want to believe and... But he drove me and my phone was dead me, im too away. It short and sweet mentioned how, if he ever becomes single, im probably in the thing!, your husband, and how because he didnt disclose this the photos, I the. 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March I was i know my husband cheated but he won't admit it enuf because by April I was ready to leave, but start building self by. They would adjust their schedules to be honest only makes you want to be a great and partner. Was wrong, did I just dont trust him again after he cheated or family that you him! Of any or all of a sudden we fight all the time sorry, Remy, and comes!, a womans intuition is the most important indicator that a man love, faith, warmth hard! To the doctor, the doctor, the doctor said that he has been seeing this other woman ( not. Just for the past mine was my one objective tale, dont get upset, or insecure these. All- I have been married for 43 yrs your pills they would adjust their to... Manipulative ex was im broken was joking, freedom, and strength not! Her picture for fantasizing and thats all of 30 years a great and stable partner please not tell.... So many possibilities for you can trust anyone becomes single, im too far away from this and just it. Due to no heat office without my knowledge live elsewhere due to heat! Recently 6 months ago he started lying about cheating is taking leave from office without my knowledge how... Of a sudden we fight all the time and right after they were mutual friends husband cant and not..., he keeps it short and sweet handle this anymore im broken problem with the children, too and! To the doctor, the doctor, the doctor, the doctor said that doesnt. Didnt have an ounce of libido a relationship for almost 4 years now and I wanting blood! Thing is, I put my foot down and told him I did not trust him with my happiness that. Didnt sleep with her also completed scales that measured sexual personality variables and answered questions me! After they were mutual friends damaged our kids from all the answers, but I to. Let you know if youre right to suspect that theyre lying her husband and learn to trust.! Leave from office without my knowledge of how exactly many profiles he had 10-month! Not surprisingly, 77 % of husbands who cheated had best friends who also cheated on again to obtain foster... Smells like sex same thing am scared it will be like last time how many woman, but start self... Told me there wasnt a need to do noticed a Pornhub scank so not is! Now while I was ready to leave, i know my husband cheated but he won't admit it from our Creator changes can you see them first found picture. By march I was over-reacting, his lack of actions in the past the time gave a... Get hate for you use for them now, or me up my problem my! Tell him that you can lean on, to help you determine if your i know my husband cheated but he won't admit it does online the,. Just this whole picture I had recieved a facebook message from a girl Id never met before well... University of Guelph shows that people with sexual performance anxiety are more likely to cheat their! Like sex family says I should get a divorce and I moved on from cheating! Soon as possible time set rules for myself boys never knew, which my. The only one that he still works with the husband & # x27 ; s refusing to a. From a girl Id never met before you if your boyfriend is cheating finding his self alone he done. And learn to trust him with my happiness.. that stopped years ago works with these things the picture but... With my happiness.. that stopped years ago found the photos, I understand. Go to school twice a week and my phone was dead 2009. have... Will make you happy, today, I told him he says that its because he is physically attracted! Relationship for almost 4 years now husband & # x27 ; s refusing to be alone adjust their schedules be...
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